Tortuga Media | Theon Ultima | Substack

Just Leave The Publishing Industry

Another screed on the plight of the Sensitive, Talented White Male Writer

Apr 29 • Daniel M. Bensen

Learn More

The Tortuga Newsletter: April 2026

Springing Forward Into A Spicy Summer

Apr 23 • Theon Ultima and Rajeev Ram

The Tortuga Technical Institute

Pirate Engineering For A Post-Legitimacy Age

Mar 21, 2025 • Rajeev Ram

Answers for the prospective buccaneer

Mar 11, 2025 • Walt Bismarck and Theon Ultima

How I'll get rich finding you a job

Introducing the Tortuga Network

Oct 29, 2024 • Walt Bismarck

Tortuga Media

Tortuga Media

We're an exclusive fraternity of seasoned knowledge workers dedicated to collaboratively plundering antiwhite corporations to secure financial freedom and build generational wealth.

Website

Recommendations

Krug

Noah Revoy | Coach, Author, Public Speaker

Noah Revoy

Antidote To Magical Thinking

Sirius White

Simon L's Newsletter

Simon L

Tom Swift

Job Hacking

5 Reasons You SHOULD NOT Job Stack

You Must have the Right Stuff

May 6 • Theon Ultima

Resumes 101: Tortuga Style

Can you convince LaShonda to pass you on to the hiring committee?

Apr 15 • ProfessionalAnon

Path to Plunder - Week 1

Overcoming Resume Gaps, Outwitting HR, and Obviating DEI

Jun 13, 2025 • Walt Bismarck

Special Guest Events

1:06:53

All Hands on Deck - The Calipers Special Guest

With Special Guest The Calipers

Apr 7 • Theon Ultima, The Calipers, and Rajeev Ram

2:01:37

All Hands on Deck - Special Guests Walt Bismarck & Annie Normal

Mar 2 • Theon Ultima, Walt Bismarck, and Annie Normal

1:06:47

All Hands on Deck - Asmy Special Guest

Feb 16 • Theon Ultima, Asmy, and Rajeev Ram

1:24:30

All Hands on Deck - Marcellino D'Ambrosio Special Guest

Feb 2 • Theon Ultima, Marcellino D'Ambrosio, and Rajeev Ram

Member Essays

Just Leave The Publishing Industry

Another screed on the plight of the Sensitive, Talented White Male Writer

Apr 29 • Daniel M. Bensen

Resumes 101: Tortuga Style

Can you convince LaShonda to pass you on to the hiring committee?

Apr 15 • ProfessionalAnon

Tax Implications For Entrepreneurs, Consultants, Stackers, and Other Pirates

Most people plan their tax preparation around the premise that they have one job or one source of income - what if you don't?

Apr 10 • Professor Axelrod

The Occult World Of Jeffrey Epstein

Feb 19 • Sirius White

Pornoland Review

Philosophy, Theology, Pornography

Jan 21 • The 13th Grade

The Pirate’s Guide to AI Image Prompting

How to Make AI Pictures That Don’t Suck

Nov 19, 2025 • Portavoz Pirata

Homes, Hope, and Our Future: America Can't Afford to Leave Millennials Behind

Answering the Call

Nov 12, 2025 • Marcus Benedicta

Help, the sky has fallen. Can I get up?

Nov 5, 2025 • Centaur Write Satyr

Featured

Four Corners Nationalism Now!

It is time for the American South-West to take itself seriously

Apr 1 • Theon Ultima

The Pirate’s Guide to AI Image Prompting

How to Make AI Pictures That Don’t Suck

Nov 19, 2025 • Portavoz Pirata

A Trinitarian Anglo-Saxon Metaphysics

Examined through the literary masterpiece The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett

Oct 2, 2025 • Rajeev Ram

Most White Collar Jobs Are Fake

White collar jobs are primarily about political positioning to capture government privileges and benefits.

Jun 17, 2025 • Simon L

Mythology of Retirement

Why Boomers Remain a Steadfast Enemy of the Generations

May 15, 2025 • Theon Ultima

Member's Only

Interview Preparation

Resources for Nailing your Upcoming Interview

Aug 8, 2025 • Theon Ultima

Additional Resources from Tom Swift

Tortuga Tech Lead Tom Swift's Additional Resources

Jul 30, 2025 • Theon Ultima and Tom Swift

Tortuga Network: Candidates

Get Placed in a Comfy Six-Figure Remote Job by our Staffing Firm

Jul 15, 2025 • Walt Bismarck and Theon Ultima

Book Club

1:13:59

Tortuga Book Club: The Pillars of the Earth 5

Oct 18, 2025 • Theon Ultima, Rajeev Ram, and Professor Axelrod

1:16:44

Tortuga Book Club: The Pillars of the Earth 4

Sep 26, 2025 • Theon Ultima, Rajeev Ram, and Professor Axelrod

1:18:42

Tortuga Book Club: The Pillars of the Earth 3

Aug 9, 2025 • Rajeev Ram and Theon Ultima

1:08:42

Tortuga Book Club: The Pillars of the Earth 2

Aug 3, 2025 • Theon Ultima and Rajeev Ram

All Hands On Deck

Philosophy Cafe

1:32:19

Philosophy Cafe 9: Mastery

Recording of the ninth session of Tortuga’s Philosophy Cafe hosted by Krug.

Mar 10 • Krug

1:43:19

Philosophy Cafe 8: Irony

Recording of the eight session of Tortuga’s Philosophy Cafe hosted by Krug.

Feb 28 • Theon Ultima

1:24:18

Philosophy Cafe 7: Penguin Mountain Meme

Recording of the seventh session of Tortuga’s Philosophy Cafe hosted by Krug.

Feb 2 • Krug

1:54:44

Philosophy Cafe 6: Nobility

Recording of the sixth session of Tortuga’s Philosophy Cafe hosted by Krug.

Jan 31 • Krug

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