Who We Are

The Tortuga Society is an exclusive professional fraternity of seasoned and aspiring knowledge workers dedicated to collaboratively plundering woke corporations to secure financial freedom and build generational wealth.

Initially the Tortuga Society focused primarily on setting up our members to benefit from the practice of “job stacking,” or working several remote jobs in parallel to collect multiple six figure salaries.

We continue to offer assistance with this, but have since expanded considerably to help our members leverage countless other asymmetric professional strategies. We’ll teach you everything you need to get that first hybrid or remote role as a data analyst, help you optimize your resume with AI tools, directly place you into roles with our external staffing firm, and even help you get your own business idea off the ground.

All members are thoroughly vetted to ensure alignment with our ideological mission and the highest professional standards.

Continue reading below for additional information on the resources available to members. Also check out our FAQs and Testimonials.

Why Subscribe?

Tortuga Media exists for readers who want the truth about how to succeed in business without really trying. A $5 monthly pledge opens the door and gives you:

1. Subscriber-Only Posts -

   Get access to our sub-only posts and our full archive of previously published essays & manuals on a myriad of subjects but most notably on how to use asymmetric strategies in business, relationships and life.

2. Exclusive Access to Captain Walt Bismarck’s Weekly Job Hunt Blog -
   ”This blog will exhaustively dissect all the usual bullshit like resume / LinkedIn optimization and interview tactics, but more importantly will detail how I assess each opportunity for red and green flags, as well as all the ways in which I’m shamelessly cheating to get ahead of the competition by deploying all the resources currently available to Tortuga Society members.”

3. Full Access to our Monthly Podcast Radio Tortuga & Our Weekly Member Discussion Recordings -
   Get access to the full version of our upcoming monthly podcast: Radio Tortuga & our Tortuga weekly discussion call recordings.

4. Ability to participate in our Tortuga Book Club

5. Access to Subscriber Only Discounts -
   Subscribers receive special periodic discounts to full Tortuga Society Membership, The Walt Right Substack, and Ultimatum Substack.

6. Closed Comment Threads & Periodic Audio Notes
   Ask us direct questions, test ideas, and track how we refine concepts before they surface anywhere else.

Leadership

Walt Bismarck:

Walt founded The Tortuga Society in the Summer of 2024 and is The Tortuga Society’s Captain. Walt acquired acclaim back in the Alt-Right of 2015-17 with his famous Disney Parodies. Later he focused on conquering corporate America and after achieving wealth decided to dedicate himself fully to Substack writing and The Tortuga Society.

Theon Ultima:

Theon was the first member to join The Tortuga Society and quickly rose through the ranks—now serving as the organization’s First Mate and COO. Theon acts as the administrative head & taskmaster. He also writes about film, literature, & poetry at his Ultimatum substack.

Join the crew

Be part of a community of people who share your interests. Participate in the comments section, or support this work with a subscription.

To learn more about the tech platform that powers this publication, visit Substack.com.